Travel is a great teacher, so preached my travel agent on the phone, when he noticed that I did not take a vacation for 1 year. I was not sure, if he was a preacher or was my wallet leecher! I suppose, he meant about culture, etiquette, life style, etc. But, I did not know that I would learn about the luggage instead! Having taken 8 suitcases for a 7 day cruise before, we decided to go light this time! How about skipping the lunch before the dream vacation, I thought. When, I peered in to the Expedia booking, it became clear that my airline may charge us for check-in luggage. Hmm! It may cost us whopping $200 just for the luggage. That just made my head lighter. It soon became evident that this lightness may eventually spread to my wallet too! I suggested to Radha, that we should cut our luggage, and not our lunch. She looked at me in amazement at my sparkling intelligence. The sparkle didn’t come from my reflective scalp as she firmly believes that my intelligence only comes in sparks! We completely avoided check-in luggage.
It was certainly a good idea to go heavy with lunch. The airline’s motto seemed very obvious; go-lite with sprite. There were no snacks and not even peanuts, but instead, they provided us with diuretic sodas. I suspiciously looked around to see if I was the chosen one for this new airline program. Non-discrimination - seemed to be their policy too! It was obvious that they were all hell bent upon slimming us before we landed. I was not sure how it helped the air travel though! The immigration authorities however, heartily welcomed the newly slimmed and trim visitors.
I quickly looked around, after we left the airport. It was good that we packed light. There was barely anyone who was fully dressed. It was a beach city, what can we expect! I would be an odd person, if I wore anything above my waist. The dawn’s discomfiture of attire can retire here. However, I was flabbergasted to see that six-pack body was no longer a fashion here. The new trend was-one ROUND PACK. I looked at myself and smiled-I am in vogue too. My daughters can no longer complain that I was old fashioned. I can easily blend with the rest as there would be none to detest or protest my scintillating scalp or bewitching belly-my years of hardly work! I slowly began to wonder, if the local government and the airlines had some mutual understanding to send slim people to balance the bulging population!
We decided to visit a famous underground river and my daughter was fully excited at that very thought. I had a chilling revelation en-route to that tourist attraction. It is not just a sight-seeing venture but a water drenching adventure. The guide described that we have to swim or wade through the entire 1 mile length of the river. The depth varies and could be pretty deep at places. I had cold sweat despite hot temperatures outside. I was oblivious to this fact and was not prepared for this trepidation filled expedition. My swimming skills were mediocre at the best and my situation was akin to a brand newborn baby. Before, he can completely relish the joy of his own birth, he is swiftly welcomed with a rectal thermometer and a painful vitamin K shot in the thigh! I was looking for a good excuse to avoid this welcome gift. Eureka! I did not bring swim trunks. My ecstasy was quickly drowned by my wife’s announcement that she brought one for me.
The water was cold so were my hands and feet. We were provided with life-vests-a mandatory for all the visitors, I believe. Some solace in this hapless situation, I thought. But, I had experience with these life jackets in the swimming pool; I never completely floated. My daughter gave me a lot of encouragement and finally made me enter the waters. I valiantly fought the attempts to drown myself. Fortunately my daughter patiently held me and calmed me down and I waded through the waters. It was underground and hence was dimly lit. I could not gauze the depth and there were no guards to save us and the rest of the group already went way ahead of us. I was a panic stricken chicken! After more than 1 hour of dreadful drenching frenzy, a guard appeared from nowhere and asked how tall I was! Then he coolly said that the deepest part of the river was 5 feet and I could walk the entire length, if I chose to. I realized that there was a serious break down of communication here. With all the energy, I expended, I was sure, I had a year worth of exercise.
We then went for little shopping later, and my wife as quite impressed by an aquamarine necklace waved at her face by an enthusiastic local vendor. He quoted $25 as it had lot of semi-precious looking stones and had a great design. She thought that the price was reasonable. But, I wanted it cheaper and bargained it for $12. We hassled and settled for $15. My wife was once again amazed at the flashes of my brilliance. As we were ravishing our new possession, another vendor walked up to us and showed the exactly same necklace and asked us if we could pay at least $1. We looked at each other and we all shared the same philosophical expression. It was an instant transformation from delight to despair.
Our resort had an infinity pool. The pool was so designed that, it gave an illusion that it was continuous with the ocean. The pool was filled to the brim. Hence, the water in the pool appeared continuous with the ocean waters. I checked the depth of the pool. Hurray! It was only 4 feet. I slowly entered the waters. I did not dare to swim. When I tried in the past, I splashed the water everywhere and I almost emptied the pool. It took a long time to fill it back and I could not face the scorching looks of the deprived swimmers. Once bitten twice shy! I was just standing at the beginning of the pool enjoying the beautiful evening and the fantastic ocean view. Then suddenly two men or twins probably, little more than my size-well! Four to five times my size to be precise just jumped into the pool. Wow! Eureka! I experienced the Archimedes principle- “The weight of the displaced fluid is directly proportional to the volume of the displacing object”, or Any floating object displaces its own weight of fluid.
There was a huge wave of water rather two! An instant tsunami in the pool. The force had such a magnitude; even some of the six footers were drowned by the massive waves. I was thrown on to the pool platform. People were scattered hither and thither. There was pandemonium in the pool. Just as we were recovering from this bedlam, we heard shrieks and cries from the other end of the pool. The wave took a boy over the infinity pool into the overflow collector area. The bottom of the collector had iron drain covers. The force with which, he fell into that, his foot got struck in between the iron rods of the drain cover. The coast guards ran from the beach area perplexed by this unforeseen Kodak moment, and rescued the boy with steel cutters. I think those Hollywood directors were not aware of this simple Archimedes principle and spent millions of dollars to create Poseidon adventure or Titanic. It just took two people in a jiffy and we had a perfect storm. That was the most inexpensive re-creation of tumultuous turbulence.
days. The finding of a significant effect of morphine on the “visual analysis” IQ subtest calls for follow-up at a later age focusing on the higher-order neurocognitive functions.